Today has been a relaxed and productive day. In comparison to Friday night which was a bit hectic and out of hand.

Thursday was big on the beer, so Friday although relaxed was massively hungover. Just played Homeworld, in which I repeatably got kicked in but its such a hypnotic game (never has space been so pink) that I couldn’t stop and Quake 2 for the video game violence aspect. I think I really needed a break from everything even my Projects.

Giles, a long standing friend from Uni days who also works at Quarry House is leaving for six months to work at St James’ Hospital. So we were all out at the Pub to see hime off. The rest of them had a couple of hours head start on me, and even by 7 they were bit worse for wear. As I said to the barmaid, “the people I am buying for are already a bit psychotic, so I don’t want to buy any Scrumpy for them”.

Saying that a pint of Scrumpy picked up Rachel who was flagging a bit, at the Duck and Drake, which was nice to go to being an old haunt and no nonsense sort of place. Strated to relax into the even there.

Went to the Fenton by about 9 for Claire’s and Caroline’s Birthday and thats were things started getting a bit surreal. It was nice to see all the shiny happy faces of the posse. But then I started to feel a bit dissociated from it all. Its all like people ware hanging onto the good old days of Uni. When I consider that most of them are 3 years younger than me, this probably is the case. Some people from this group have been giving me flack for settling down with Rachel recently, but they probably don’t realise my motives for it. I am quiet simply not 18 anymore, and I need a stable home environment to get my writing done, which is giving me alot more pleasure than getting drunk and stoned (not that I don’t enjoy these things in moderation)

Then things got even more bizzarre when this fat fella started sliming over the rather out of it Rach. I left him to it not wanting to act the Alpha male, since I hope I am beyond this, yet being bombarded Alpha male signals to action, as the reptile brain overcome the civilsed brain. Fortunatly we left the pub before things came to a head.

However me and Rach, who realised what sort of position she had, had a quiet talk as the rest of them stomped off to Claire’s for a party. Cleared things up, then the beer causht up with Rach, who had only a packet of crisps all day. Aforementioned packet of crisps was ceremonisly puked up on the pavement (hence the term “Packet of pavement puke crisps” that I taunted the “Princess of Puke” the next day.] and it was in and out of taxis, the first of which drove off, untill we got home. Could have gone back to the party, but was pretty out of it and tired by the nights proceedings so I sobered up a bit by posting on Barbelith Underground for a bout an hour until I went to bed.

Saturday was a restfull slob day, with Rach feeling a bit subdued and sorry for the previous nights events, and me in equal parts playing house maid and Mikey taker. One thing I managed to make progress on was that I finally got my head round Half-life Mapping. My first playable effort is basically a monster in a box, with a gun for the player. I’ll have to put on my website for a laugh, so look out for the ACID BOX (once you see the textures you’ll see why)

Rest came easy and deep that night. Not sure whether it was Lucid dreaming or not, but my body seemed to be infused with a spirit of deep relaxation and the realsation that I’ve been taking it too seriously recently, and that I should do it for fun. Yeehaw!!!

So today was conducted in that spirit with continuing adventures in Half-life Mapping (a bigger map which I’m probaly going to call “Barneys and Zombies” or “The Escape”), some work on my Monkey RPG( which seems to be writing itself) and updating and fixing my Webpage (go there now and see photo’s of me when I was 18 and read my stories!!!).

Talked with Rach this evening about what was worrying her about work, and it seems that a caravaning holiday at the end of September is on the cards to recharge spirits.